chase the love you deserve n find joy in the ordinary

stay close to the sounds that make you feel alive. the sound of the song that illuminates the pathway of your feet, the voice that when speaking your name, caresses every syllable of it and lets it go out into existence exuding love. surround yourself with patterns, colors and designs that literally cause your eyes to drink in inspiration. you deserve to read words that flow and ebb like a heartbeat, to wake up every morning enthusiastic about the opportunity to feel...ALIVE. REALLY LIVE. yes I do have those two words painted on my wall. the key to life is to really live, to never settle, to always explore every nook and cranny, to make time for what you want. everyone keeps saying that time is speeding up, that all the children grow too quick, the holidays over too soon, the cold too quickly following the sunshine. and I sit as the world and its captives run and run around in circles, always regretting the time passed, all I see is fools running facing backwards. life happens in front of us, the kids grow up while we look at the past, the kisses grow dull as fear sinks in, and the seasons change and take with them all of the glorious unique adventures they held. a moment...is lost......

so, my advice, take it or leave it. Carpe diem. Seize this day.

your life no matter how many years you have left no matter if all you have is this moment, right this second, seize it, do what you've always wanted to do, be who you've always wanted to be! The kisses are so sweet, so delicate, the hugs comforting, the sunshine inspiring, the snow illuminating. let 'what is' be. everyones got it going on, everyones got reasons for why they are who they are. everyone has a story to tell. listen up. ya I mean this. you listen to someones story, and you learn to love yours. every moment of you is glorious, the lord loves your story, he loves you. a novel that would captivate billions is waiting to be written about you, a painting showcasing your divinity, a song serenading of your fantastic self. your opinions, your loves, your hopes, your dreams, your pains...it ALL MATTERS. And no matter what the world says SOMEONE DOES CARE ABOUT YOU. SOMEONE APPRECIATES YOUR EXSISTANCE.

The lord is anxiously engaged in your story, he cannot contain his excitement and love for the life you live. HE LOVES YOU. every little bit of you. the savior is my best friend and I trust him completely. I know how much the savior loves you because every day he freely showers me in love that I can hardly believe I deserve. he loves me. oh what peace that statement brings. im quirky, wired, impatient, and random...I spend to much time daydreaming and get obsessed with the silliest things. and yet. he loves me. my savior, my god. loves me. he knows me too. he knew me before I knew myself, he held my hand and literally held me as I cried in pain from the loss of myself. he knew id need the family I have, so he gave me my six angels, my 6 siblings to be a light to me everyday. he gave me my parents, my heros in more ways then countable, who quide and council me and love me with all the love in the world. He gave me my brother in laws, who constantly make me smile as they love my sisters and treat them as princesses, showing me what I want in my future husband. My sister in law showing me patience, and the power of confidence. my nieces and nephews, oh how I adore being able to be constantly surrounded By kids who act just like me (: they keep me energetic, they keep me humble. I am blessed.

I just gotta say that I am grateful for every moment I have every lived, I am greatful for every person who has come into my life. this life I live is far from perfect, but I live in the NOW. this moment right now I feel WHOLE, I FEEL JOYFUL and I know that this life is meant to be inspiring, it is meant to give you a kick in the butt, its meant to be hard. it wouldn't be worth it if it wasn't as hard as it is. I LOVE MY LIFE. and every single person deserves to feel the same way. so again..STAY CLOSE TO THE SOUNDS THAT MAKE YOU FEEL ALIVE, SURROUND YOURSELF WITH PATTERNS, COLORS AND DESIGNS THAT LITERALLY CAUSE YOUR EYES TO DRINK IN INSPIRATION. LIVE THE LIFE YOU HAVE ALWAYS IMAGINED. because you my dear. are special. no one has the same brilliant future as you, no one can give the world what you get to give it. carpe diem darling. live your life, dance to the music, smile, and thank god for the sheer greatness of the life you live.

2013 begins on the wings of 2012.

Today is Jan 1St. Crazy thing is is that this year I actually felt like a whole year had passed by at a good speed.  I fell in love this year. Not just with certain boys. But with myself, with life , with sunburns, late nights, glittery snow, holding hands, kissing, snuggling, twinkle lights, motocross, movies, water, sunglasses, softlips, lipgloss and going to dances, I fell in love with pretty things and clever words, with listening to someone play piano, I fell in love with amazing people and there passions, with talking in the rain, with watching movies with my friends, cars, running,working, and conquering my fears,.I.fell in love with the power of confidence and happiness. 2012. Was my year. I had my first kiss, my first job, my first and last year at Lehi high, and my first adventures.  I found my best friends. And lost a few too. I got taught lessons. The lesson of true friendship. The lesson of hard work. The lesson of moving on and moving forward. The lesson of independence. Of.consideration. And life. I may have had moments of loss, loneliness, and sickness but nothing compares to how I've been inspired , motivated and loved this year.  2012 WAs a good year and I know 2013 will be even greater :)